Sunday, December 31, 2006

Happy New Years, ya lucky bastards

To all of you that have amazing plans to get ridiculously intoxicated tonight, I salute you. I, unfortunately, will be sitting at home and probably be in bed by 10 because I have strep throat. What a way to start 2007.

On the upside, when the fever hits 104, I start having mild hallucinations, so that's fun. Wait, no, it's really not. Damn. Well, everybody drink one for the Lioness tonight.

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Friday, December 29, 2006

No! Not Yet! Noooooo!

It's not even January yet, and what shows up in my e-mail today?

An assignment for the first day of classes for next semester.

Damnit. Whatdya mean I have five more semesters of this crap?! I don't wanna. I don't waannnnnaaaaa. I have at least another solid week of binge drinking ahead of me in hopes of purging every retained bit of knowledge from last semester out of my head before I can even BEGIN to contemplate another semester.

Oh well. At least it's bowl season.

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Out with the old, in with the new

With 2007 fast approaching, I figured it was time to update my links. Some people have asked me how I choose who to link. Basically, when I get either a request from someone to add their blog or I notice a particular blogger commenting a lot, I'll start reading their blog occasionally. Then, from those I've taken notice of, if they continue posting (as quite a few die out within a month or two) and I think their blog is humorous and compatible with mine, I'll add them. I usually update my links every few months.

So, in the UT category, welcome to the blogroll Cavalier Law and Paragon to Pieces.
Goodbye Emphasis Added and Passive Voice.
In the non-UT category, hello So-Called Law School, and hello Butterflyfish.
Goodbye Law and Mommyhood. (It might also soon be a goodbye to Littlest Tortfeasor if she does indeed stick with her decision to leave law school.)



Monday, December 25, 2006

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas to my bloggy readers! Hope everyone is enjoying family and eating way too much. Here's a highlight from my holidays so far:

Conversation with my 6-year old cousin, exasperated that I did not know the plot line of the children's show Suite Life of Zach and Cody:
Cousin: "C'mon [Lioness]! Didn't they teach you ANYTHING in law school?!"
Lioness: "Nope. They definitely did not."
Cousin: "Then why do you go?"
Lioness: "I guess I'm just a masochist"
Cousin: "A what?"
Lioness: "Nevermind. Go and play with your brother."

A few minutes later:
Aunt: "[Cousin], why did you hit your brother?"
Cousin: "Um...well...I guess I'm just a masochist?"
Aunt: "WHAT!?"
Cousin: "I dunno. That's what [Lioness] said earlier."
Aunt: (After shooting me a dirty look) "Well, first of all, hitting someone else makes you a sadist, not a masochist, and second of all, stop repeating anything [Lioness] tells you. Ever."


Friday, December 22, 2006

Finish Line

As of 11:00 am this morning, I am finally finished with my first semester of law school. Yee-haw. Somebody put the bars on alert: section 1 plans to drink them dry tonight.

Next phase: manic grade checking. Though, let's not lie. I started doing that a few days ago.

Also, this is my 100th post. Fitting, I think.

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Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Hungry Like a Wolf

Last night was an interesting night. Suffice it to say that my Legal Research and Writing grade will not be helped by the fact that I discovered a Korean-style karaoke place (private booths) that serves alcohol till 4 am. Anyways, so after numerous rounds of soju shots, I ended up crashing at the house of one of the people in our group. Blissfully intoxicated, I went to sleep without much notice of my surroundings.

I was awoken this morning by a 150-lb full blooded wolf licking my face. Apparently it was this person's pet. And do you know what I thought when, through hangover-blurred eyes, I saw this wild animal with its large teeth mere inches from my face?

STRICT LIABILITY! STRICT LIABILITY! (Holyshitwhyisthereawolflickingmyfaceifiteatsmethenitsgoingtobe:) STRICT LIABILITY!

Perhaps Torts served me well after all.


Sunday, December 17, 2006

I hate Target.

So, even though I needed to be studying for my torts final this morning, I also needed to do my Christmas shopping. Problem: I hate shopping, I hate malls, and I especially hate them during the Christmas season. Solution: The internet. Or so one would think, right?

I spent two hours on, picking presents, making sure the only presents I picked were available to ship within 24 hours, that type of thing. Only to find that for some reason, the Web site wouldn't let me enter in that I needed two-day shipping. The earliest date that I could guarantee getting my presents here by was December 27th.

So I called the customer service people. Why can't I get expedited shipping? Oh, sorry Lioness, but Friday was the last day to order and have things guaranteed by Chistmas eve. Uberpwned!

Me and Target are no longer on speaking terms.


Friday, December 15, 2006

2 down. 2 to go.

Well I managed to survive my first two law school finals. Some observations:

1. The only appropriate thing to do after a final is drink. If you move on directly to studying for your next final, you will either self-combust or all your classmates will hate you. Probably both.

2. Witnessing the day before finals freakouts of various friends teaches you way more about them than you can learn through seeing and talking to them every day for a semester. Witnessing their attempts to pretend that you didn't see them freak out like scared little girls? That's just comical.

3. If you are ever "totally sure" that a certain type of question or a certain area of knowledge is going to be on the test, then it absolutely and categorically will not be on the test. Same goes for anything that was tested on any of the professor's previous exams.

4. While I can't say authoritatively until grades come out, I get the distinct feeling that grades are going to be a total crapshoot.

5. I've seen at least 100 people in this past week that I have never seen at the law school or at any law school function before in my life. They all look patronizingly carefree. I have been told these are the 3Ls who have already accepted offers. Bitches.

6. The proctors are utterly useless. And for the love of all that is holy, it doesn't take a genius to figure out that if there are two proctors, and one speaks with a heavy foreign accent, the other one should read the damn exam instructions.

7. My feelings towards extegrity can be explained here.

8. My feelings towards finals in general can be explained here.


Monday, December 11, 2006

Good Luck!

Good luck on finals, my 1L brethren.

(Unless you're in my section. In that case, I wish no bad luck upon you, just no additional good luck. ;-))


Saturday, December 09, 2006

Moral of the story: Never clean during finals season

The other day I thought perhaps if I cleaned my messy apartment, maybe I would be better able to focus on studying. So I started to clean, and after about 10 minutes, I found my old Gameboy.

Con Law has now taken a back seat to saving the princess.


Friday, December 08, 2006

Be the Best

Well, bloggy-fans, I think it has come the time to address perhaps the most controversial topic this blog may ever discuss. Yep, that's right. It has come time to ask the question:

Who has the best breakfast tacos in Austin?

On your mark. Get set. Go! I'll post the first ever Lunching with Lions award for whoever draws the most votes.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Damn, that's a hot clerkship

It started with a few mass e-mails. Then a few targeted e-mails. And now the postal onslaught has begun. That's right, it's December, so legal employers are trying to woo (or reject) the 1Ls with varying tactics. The different styles of the firms has reminded me of various dating tactics:

Tactic 1: Showing some skin.
Firm A is employing the classic "look at me! look at me!" move, having already sent out two e-mails and a full color brochure in the mail.

Tactic 2: Playing hard to get
Firm B sent a letter basically saying "yeah, we got your resume, and if we have time we *might* look at it, and if we do that we *might* ask you to interview. We'll get back to you."

Tactic 3: Flat-out rejection
You always want what you can't have, and that is what made firm C's letter so special. The gist of it was "You want a position here? Ha! Get back to us when you're a 2L, loser."

Tactic 4: Buying me drinks
Firms A, D, and E are having firm receptions in Austin. And we all know that every summer associate positions appears cuter, funnier, and smarter after a few drinks.

Clearly, tactic 4 is the most useful. Other firms: take note.

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Friday, December 01, 2006

Just like a cheap hooker...

I hate Lexis. I really do. I’ll also take any excuse not to focus on finals, and hating them is more fun than finishing my outlines.

Why do I hate them? Well…

I’m sitting here, studying, when I realize that the only thing that could make my study experience complete would be to hear Want You to Want Me by Cheap Trick. And I wanted to hear it that very second. I used to have the mp3, but it was lost somewhere in the great hard drive crash of 2005. So, being the legal and ethical person I am, I headed over to Itunes.

At which point I thought, “Wait! I know! I have enough Lexis points to get 10 free Itunes songs! I’ll just do that!”

So I headed over to the Lexis webpage, and searched rather unsuccessfully for the damn Ultimate Rewards banner for a while. Apparently, it’s only on the screen if you login from, but not just, as I tend to use. Not finding it, I did a google search. Still not finding it, I went through my deleted messages to find an old e-mail from Eric Knustrom until I finally got onto the right web page.

Once on the damn site, I went to my account history and realized that Westlaw points are FAR superior in every way to Lexis points. I’m gonna hold out till my 3L year and get that damn Wine Refrigerator thing from Westlaw, but with the puny points allotted by Lexis, I’ll take whatever I can get, whenever I can get it. It’s like Westlaw is my true love, and Lexis is my cheap hooker on the side.

Anyways, I had exactly 750 Lexis points. Which is exactly how many I needed to get my 10 free itunes songs. So I ordered it. And I got the code. But when I tried to enter the code, and every subsequent time I’ve tried after that, it tells me that “the music store network connection has timed out.” I blame this entirely on Lexis, regardless of whether it’s truly their fault or not. So now I sit here, point-less, music-less, and having wasted nearly an hour between trying to get the song and having written up this blog. Ahh, finals season….just one more reason to hate Lexis.

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